Sometimes I read news clips before I start studying. I read today more about Astronaut Lisa Nowak. She is accused of kidnapping and attempted murder. I was curious about her and skimmed here bio at NASA. We are of similar age and I wondered how she could throw here success away even for a love interest. I don`t want to debate her guilt. I tend to thrash about something and my study isn`t as deep as it should be when I have something like this on my mind. It is just that a PhD is an incredible amount of work. Lisa went through great odds to become an astronaut. Why would she even think of dumping all of that. The investment in here is very great also. I cannot imagine how much work I have done over the years to get to this point and dump it. If I were not able to work with the skills I have built where would I be. I feel that outsourcing etc are kind of the same threat. But, Lisa`s threat allegedly was to a love interest. I struggle with this weighted scale that I find myself thinking about. Should the PhD consume you at the expense of your family. Can you find another way so that your family is not at expense. I was building my skills to succeed on this PhD long before I was married. I have had trouble with my learning disability all my life. So the weight I have built up is it greater than the family I have built. I think when in rage your weighting system goes out the window....all things equal. If you get in a situation...choose not to choose...that is often a choice that is often overlooked. Let time be on you side. Wait..Wait..Wait... In other words, "sleep on it". You may not get a second chance. A man is accused by the sultan and sentenced to death. The man says to the sultan, "In one year I will teach your horse to sing." The sultan says, "That is impossible." The man thinks to himself: "In one year a great deal may happen, the sultan may die, he may be attacked and captured, or have a change of heart. I have a greater chance of living even if I take on these impossible odds of teaching a horse to sing." The man says to the sultan, "I will take those impossible odds and you may kill me in one year if I fail to do as I say." I have exercised this principle many times. It must be done in humility. My learning disability and the passing of tests on the second or third time are hallmarks of my success.

I have been studying OCL more. Today and yesterday I did query operations, attribute operations, and started adding invariants. I am getting the syntax down before moving on to how they work into UML diagrams. The book, "The Object Constraint Language, Second Edition" recommended by the "UML for dummies" author has been a great asset. It should be on the reading list and is not. I find it irresponsible that the tests and reading lists are not kept up to date. It does teach me to go and look elsewhere and maybe that is the point. Having to look at books that are very old like, "Structured Analysis and System Specification" and new ones like the one above show how the PhD is all about history. History is anything not in the present or future, it is even one second ago. We have to know all of it whether it is cruft or not.